– W.J. Slim
Lying in my bed tossing and turning, trying to find that sweet spot to fall into a deep and fulfilling rem. Then I got to it, right there, and off i fell. My mind took me to it's favorite place, a nice recurring dream, where I am in the arms of a lovely woman, her curly locs entwined within my fingers, our legs locked in place and our mouths doing a dance of the tongue. mmmmm i just love it here, no issues no worries just non stop love making and it just keeps getting better and better. Im oblivious to anything and anyone, especially the young korean girl who has just entered my home. She is looking for me and yelling my name as loud as she possibly can.
"Mr James..Mr James.."
I am still deep in this sleep yet I can distinctly hear my name being called over and over, and then a tug ...
"mr James, wake up , you got to come quick come quick , shop burning"
I awoke ..well sort of with a thick hard on and wondering how the hell she got in my house and the dogs didnt bark?...
"Ok Ok im awake Im awake.. call 911 it will be alright"
"no ..911 already called we need your help mr james please come hurry now..."
She bolted down the stairs and out the house.. I put on some jeans, sneakers and my leather coat and ran behind her.. as I rounded the corner i could smell the fire, the smoke, and see the girl.. The store, Ms Choi's Needful things and pawn shop, is where my heart was housed, amongst the many other odds and ends.
As i looked upon the firemen fighting the blaze I started to wonder , what will become of me now?
"mr James mr james I cant find my Oma"
we walked over to the man in charge at the scene to see if Ms Choi had been found or might have been on a stretcher..or something!!
"a woman ran back into the building, I have my men searching for her now"
just then two firemen arrived with Ms Choi, she was wearing an oxygen mask, and immediately grabbed her grand daughter.. I was happy to see her small frail frame.. and overcome with emotions.. this little hard woman had been caretaker to my most precious gift, and now she was in our arms but still defiant..
"lemme go lemme go.. Mr james .. "
"Ms Choi please sit down and rest, dont worry about the shop"
"shop?" she looked up at me with those warm wrinkled brown eyes, "mr james I am insured.. i can recoup all of my investments, plus i managed to save most of my more treasured pieces over there on the corner, policeman watching over it for me..I no trust him tho so Sung Ye next door neighbor is watching him too....I not worried for me.. I worry for you"
"Ok dont stop your babbling now, out with it"
"Mr James, you know of love and happiness, they usually go together, just like joy and pain. people often forget that when you decide to love to also prepare for the pain, you hid your heart away in hopes to spare you of the pain, but what of it now Mr James? Do you not have joy, do you not have happiness, you have love for the things you want to love, these loves are unconditional, they require little to no work on your part except that you be you..hmmmm but the passion of a lover and the need for a companion requires work and it also comes with pain.."
"Ok im not liking this.. where is my heart .. what are you saying?
"mr james " Every great leap forward in your life comes after you have made a clear decision of some kind"
Your heart is in there.. the fire...do you want it? Go get it"
I had a decision to make, right then right now, I didnt know what to do, so i just ran into the store ......
"Mr James Mr james ..to the left in the wardrobe.." was what the young korean girl shouted...
"oma you sent him back into those flames ..he could die"
Ms Choi looked up at her grand daughter .."hmmm he could die that is a possibility .. "Man is only truly great when he acts from his passions."
I made it past the firemen who yelled obscenities at me and gave chase... I got through the door way and headed left, the smoke was burning my lungs, but i saw the wardrobe .. it was a flame but one door had fell off its hinges and I was able to reach in and grab the box just as the firemen reached and grabbed my ass!!
"you are one dumb mutha fuka.. you could have died in here"
"yes but if I hadn't gone in I might have died anyway"
I made it back over to the ladies and really had not looked into the box. It felt different and I just assumed that it was the same one. The building was now fully engulfed and was burning out of control.. It would be only a matter of time before it was all over.
I turned to Ms Choi, and said "here you go,..at least I was able to salvage this"
"Was it worth the pain Mr James? the fear of loss? the realization and the passion to fight for something you wanted that badly? "
"it was worth it, damn worth it"
"good ..cause this is not the box that holds your heart, and now it appears it has burned up in the flames Mr James.. gone is your heart that you hid here to protect it from pain and hurt.. what will you do now?
I stood there, stammering for the next 10 minutes.. I had this deep emptiness and feeling of woe, yet I had this hope from where I do not know.. but hope rings eternal they say..and just when a tear fell from my cheek to my chest , Ms Choi gave me a thick sterling bracelett.. enscribed
There are seldom.If ever, any hopeless situations, but there are many people who lose hope in the face of some situations.
I thought about those words and smiled..
"im going to be all right Ms Choi.. I will go speak to the policeman and see how we can move the rest of your things"
As i walked over to the cop, i noticed that a lovely lady with long flowing curly locs walked over to the ladies and sat with them for a minute .. I wondered what they were talking about and really wondered who she was..
"ms choi, I just came by to thank you for my purchase yesterday and low and behold the store is on fire, are you ok ?
"ah yes i am quite ok my love.. and how are you enjoying the nice velvet box ?
"Oh it is so lovely I have yet to open it and deposit my things inside but I am quite sure it will be ok.thank you again.. by the way , who is that over there with the policeman? He seems to be quite interested in us it seems"
"Oh him, nice man. he is the former owner of that box..you should thank him one day"
"well bless him, I will do just that right now..hmmm hope my hair is holding up"
as she walked up to me, I looked over her shoulder and saw the little girl nudging Ms choi something fierce..
"oma how could you.. you sold his heart to the lady"
"shhhhhhh let us watch my plan in action..."
and so it goes.......I shook my head and rolled over , damn had I been asleep all this time? was I still dreaming? the shower was running, I guess I would soon find out
do you have a safe place for your heart and your love?
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