Day Eleven

Day Eleven (revised)Told you I'd be back didn't I. Just in time to tell you that we have all officially lost our shit. I am not joking, playin around, or bullshitting in any way. We are all officially committable as of yesterday. How do I know this you might ask? Easy, cause I have never laughed so hard in mu friggin life. And I imagine that if you saw a couple of slow walking douches that were trying to eat your face off slipping on cooking oil you'd laugh to.So here's where we stand as of now. April and Dog boy are history. No one knows for sure where they went, but they are nowhere to be found. I can't say that I honestly care at this moment, because they knew the consequences before the stepped outside. I think for the most part the rest of the group thinks the same thing of them. To throw their own lives away out of pure selfishness in light of what happened to their supposed friends shows the types of people that they really were. Granted April probably was the most gullible of all of u, she still knew what was going on regardless of what Cujo told her. Two people short made the rescue mission that much harder. I mean hell I would have happily tossed both of their dumb asses in front of me as a shield, or loved to pop one between their eyes after they turned into type three's.Regardless of being to retards short, having a resolve as steeled as ours made us nothing short of unstoppable. I'd say ask the dumbies (dumb zombies) but if they could talk, there weren't many left in the manhole area once we were done reigning fire and pissin bullets. The Pipe bomb idea worked damn well. We made a concoction of live ammo ammonia and some other stuff that Brian got off of the internet. The way we rolled out of the garage with guns blazing and bombs incinerating was unbelievable. I wish I had a camera to video tape some of this stuff…..wait. Man fuck we are in Wal-Mart aren't we, why the hell didn't I think of that beforehand. Ah well, that's another days tale, in case they get Will Smith to play me in the movie. Back to the shit. We were all popping heads like piñatas full of chocolate. When we got to the manhole I think I saw Brian staring off in the woods, but I'm not sure what caught his attention. It may have been what I think is called the thousand yard stare. Something that war vets get when they've been in the field to long. Whatever it was didn't last long, because he got his head back in it when Freddie dropped the manhole cover back down. That's when we unloaded on the rest of them full throttle like world was gonna end.It's kinda like we're moving in sequence now. I guess after being in this type of position for over a week we've started to know and trust each other more. Once we got inside Fred hit the door but it was delayed to long. Tough shit for them. We didn't care anymore quite honestly. And to prove it Brian went over to his computer and jumped on the internet in the middle of the fight. What a fucker right?Now back to the really funny shit after our little Patrick Swayze Wolverines rescue mission we were swarmed with those things. We finally started to gain the upper hand on them using a hell of a lot of our ammo when we made it to the roof of the garage. For some reason we thought it would be funny to see how these things react to cooking oil in their current walking state. We drilled huge holes in the roof and poured down ridiculous amount of cooking oil and watched Ice Skating with the Undead right in front of our eyes. Now imagine if you will, someone that limps and pulls one leg as they are walking. Got that. Now imagine that same person walking sliding around like Disney on Ice. There aren't many things that can make me cry in a good way, but I'm telling you That is one of them. Wanna know what another one of those things is. How bout me deciding to go down stairs and start up some of the service equipment. One of the things in the garage grabbed a hold of the automatic tire remover and got its hand yanked clean off. And the Stupid thing just stood there. It was just looking and staring aimlessly like it didn't know what was going on.Once they were all completely incapacitated we went down stairs I cleats so we could walk, and popped them once in between the eyes to end the day. Brian and Mastaff put kitty litter over the floor to soak up all of the oil. One of these days we're going to have to get to the truck, so we're gonna need to keep the garage safe for us. What a day. At least we survived this one without anymore loses. Ya know, these guys aren't so bad after all.
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