Why couldn’t it be contained? Why could we not control it? The purpose of the virus seemed so clear to me, yet the way it evolved from host to host made it so complex. We were such fools to think that we could control such an intense for of nature. I was such a fool to think that I could escape fates cruel joke. I was so selfish to allow things to get this far yet blame everyone else for my families fate.I still remember the day the corpses were brought back from Japan. There was a big commotion about it because there were a slew of company policies that were being broken. First was the willful contamination of this entire country by bringing a foreign virus with no known cure across the ocean. There were also the typical customs violations being broken by both governments. As well as what some could argue as aiding in the genocide on numerous Japanese citizens. Nevertheless, the male and female corpses were brought to the port of our branch office in Georgia where they stayed in cryogenic stasis for the next six months. During that time, and unknown to the world public as well as much of the CDC, there was an ongoing debate as to what should be done with these two guests.There were many arguments, more for then against I should add, about the benefits of keeping and researching this new virus. Myriam Stanley, public relations director, stated that having such a deadly virus brought into the United States was deadly two fold. First being that no one civilian knew that they were being placed in such incredible danger. The public would turn rabid on the CDC if word got out that we were playing with their lives in such an underhanded way. Second, she stated that if word got out to other countries that the CDC was working on a virus that had already claimed hundreds of lives, there would be rumors of chemical warfare and a third world war may be on the horizon. As much as we all wish we had heeded her warnings, the words from the Board of Directors spokesperson Craig Bernard were the most damaging to Myriam’s cause. Craig started with the typical bureaucratic speech of how ludicrous it was for anyone to believe that it was possible that a war could start under scientific premises. “Plausible Deniability” was one of the phrases he used, as well as “Selective Disinformation.” What he was saying was that regardless of what happened with the virus we could deny the entire story or selectively tell the media and public whatever information makes them feel better about our findings. He went a few steps further and said that, “It is our duty as public humanitarians to try and help humanities odds of survival against any threats be it biologically human made or born in the wild.” You would be surprised at how many people by the idea that playing God is plausible when given the right monkey see monkey do show.After hearing the same rhetoric back and forth I decided to stand in and make my point. I stated that it was no one’s intent to mislead or hinder the public in any way. Regardless of what happens with the virus the CDC will hold full accountability to it. I stated regardless of the humanitarian rights that our company held to, we have already thrown them all out of the window for individual self-exploiting reason. We were already in the middle of an election year as well as a possible recession that had American and many other nations on the verge of financial down turn. With so much negative on the worlds plate the ability to use one of the most lethal viruses to help humanity would give light and a new cause for many people to get behind and stand for. Was the world or my family my biggest concern when I made my speech? Honestly, no. My newly found breast cancer made my choice long before this meeting convened. Hearing two years before during a random check up that a tumor was found in my right breast and one year later that another tumor was found, I was at a point in my life that anything that would save me was worth ANY risk. Hindsight being what it is I now know that it was no one but I that dealt the death blow to human kind. Once the meeting adjourned the Board of Directors met again and decided that tests would proceed on the virus in an attempt to unlock the secrets to its regenerative properties.What brought me to the Center for Disease Control in the mid-nineties originally was not the thirst for knowledge or even the idea to help humanity over come natures most vile plagues. It was a pure unadulterated want to secure a place for myself and my family amongst the fittest. A want to have my name with the greats of history for the entire world to know that I helped stop another killer from wiping out an entire people. With that want and drive I dedicated my entire life to observing, learning about, and watching the different virus’s and illnesses across the world wipe out entire populations. Today I stand on a platform that will now end the lives of what seems to be some of the last survivors in Concord North Carolina. It does not matter anymore how this has happened, only that in end in the most just and swift manner possible.Sarah Caullings CDC Q.A Administrator
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