“Kgosi's plan of attack is foolish,”
“What do you mean? The Lungi prophesy says that the Kishnu will begin to follow the Lungi way. My uncle is only fulfilling this to take back our lands. He says their land belongs to our people and they drove us into the caves long ago – Ajuoga you have taught this yourself. It is a good plan,”
“Is it a good plan or is it foolish? There are gods – there are those before us. The Lungi believe this too. They say that their god gave a word that our people would come to him, after a war which they will win. Is this not the very thing Kgosi is doing? Does it matter that he does this with intent? He still does it Phenyo. There are better ways to have war than mocking a man's god. We should let the Lungi be. Everything that we need is plentiful here, the land is good to us. We want for nothing. Kgosi is a fool of the worst kind – he spills the blood of our sons to show his power. His war is not with Nkosana, it is with the god of Nkosana. It would be better if he aimed his spear at the one whom he can see. Men are not suited for wars with the unseen,”
“That is why I want to lead a group of women there instead Ajuoga. I would like your blessing and a muthi for this journey,”
“You ask for my blessing and I will ask those before us for this, for you. You ask for my muthi and I will make a special one for you to drink. You will ask Kgosi to give this duty to you, and he will fill your ears with laughter,”
“I will show him that mine is a better way,”
“The women in Kishnuizwe have always been warriors in some form or another and you are the best – as good as most men and better than some, but Kgosi thinks too much of men Phenyo. Victory in war he preserves for men,”
“I want to ask the she-god myself. I believe she will give me the power to bend my uncle's will to mine on this matter Ajuoga,”
“I have been waiting for you to ask for proof of the she-god Phenyo...so long have I waited for you to believe. Now you have at last asked to see her, though your asking comes wearing the cloak of disbelief,”
”If I did not believe there was a she-god -” Ajuoga stood and leaned over to touch Phenyo's face and her hand felt for her nose then moved down to her lips. Using the tip of her thumb and the finger next to it she pulled a little at Phenyo's lips and held them tightly, as if one more utterance would summon a known terror. Her next words were frightened, whispered caveats and she let go of Phenyo's lips before she spoke them.
“No, No....No Phenyo! She gives us words only for truth. She does not protect those who use them for lies. You know this daughter. We speak only of what we do or will do or what is – never if I did or did not. There is a she-god or there is not!”
“There is,” said Phenyo, visibly startled.
“I believe. I want to see her,” she continued. She may as well go along with it. Although Ajuoga seemed willing to show her the she-god, she had decided no matter how obviously a figment of Ajuoga's mind, she would behave as though she were real. It was the respectful thing to do.
“Good! Now that you have asked you shall see daughter of mine. Will you lend me your eyes?...will you tell me what you see? I want to know of her face – again...the she-god. I want to know of her beauty! My eyes....my eyes....I only have eyes in my sleep! There was a time when my eyes could see...long ago...I was still a girl. The she-god came to me then but I did not believe! I saw her with my eyes and she took them with her when she left me Phenyo – she took my eyes! I refused to believe but I was only a girl. Will you be my eyes Phenyo? I want to see her face again!”
Ajuoga trembled as she rubbed her hands together. Her words rushed into one another in desperation then were slow, like a procession of beasts running with all their might slowing down for a cliff ahead and slamming into one another's flesh. For the first time Phenyo felt afraid in her company but reached for Ajuoga's leathery face with courage and wiped away the tears with her fingers. Ajuoga seemed more like a stranger with remnants of familiarity to her now.
“Yes mother...from where will she come?”
“Shhh...only believe what you can see...daughter. Believe what you see,” Ajuoga stood slowly and spread her arms – the left one towards the ceiling and the other perpendicular to it. Though closed, her eyes shone a dull white through the lids and escaped between her lashes at the bottom like rays of a partially eclipsed sun. The arch in her back straightened itself triumphantly against the rush of wind that flew into the dwelling, past Phenyo, then orbited both women. Ajuoga's hair rose and fell while Phenyo's neatly woven hair withstood the wind. Dust and small pieces of debris danced. Phenyo stood but wanted badly to abandon her flesh standing there, allowing her self-awareness to escape invisibly, unable to be followed or seen. Shiluba could be heard outside scurrying about and making high-pitched pleas. If the winds didn't calm soon, the chimpanzee would seek comfort in the heights of the trees away from the izindlu.
“Ajuoga?”
“You are Phen-yo,”
“Yes...are you from those before us?”
“Phenyo...you are a fine woman indeed. I see why she loves you so,”
“You are the she-god?”
“Yes,”
“What have you done with mother's tongue?”
“She is here still – and has not been harmed,”
“What do you want of me?”
“I did not summon you Phenyo. What do you desire of me?”
“What is your name?”
“You wanted to know my name? How can a she-god help you?”
“I didn't believe,”
“I know – she knows. I told her you would not believe until you could see,”
“Whose blood belongs to you?”
“No Phenyo, I am not an ancestor of the Kishnu, the Kishnu are of me,”
“Then you are -”
“Phenyo, do you believe?”
“No,”
“Will you believe?”
“Yes,”
Copyright 2012 All Rights Reserved. TK McEachin
“What do you mean? The Lungi prophesy says that the Kishnu will begin to follow the Lungi way. My uncle is only fulfilling this to take back our lands. He says their land belongs to our people and they drove us into the caves long ago – Ajuoga you have taught this yourself. It is a good plan,”
“Is it a good plan or is it foolish? There are gods – there are those before us. The Lungi believe this too. They say that their god gave a word that our people would come to him, after a war which they will win. Is this not the very thing Kgosi is doing? Does it matter that he does this with intent? He still does it Phenyo. There are better ways to have war than mocking a man's god. We should let the Lungi be. Everything that we need is plentiful here, the land is good to us. We want for nothing. Kgosi is a fool of the worst kind – he spills the blood of our sons to show his power. His war is not with Nkosana, it is with the god of Nkosana. It would be better if he aimed his spear at the one whom he can see. Men are not suited for wars with the unseen,”
“That is why I want to lead a group of women there instead Ajuoga. I would like your blessing and a muthi for this journey,”
“You ask for my blessing and I will ask those before us for this, for you. You ask for my muthi and I will make a special one for you to drink. You will ask Kgosi to give this duty to you, and he will fill your ears with laughter,”
“I will show him that mine is a better way,”
“The women in Kishnuizwe have always been warriors in some form or another and you are the best – as good as most men and better than some, but Kgosi thinks too much of men Phenyo. Victory in war he preserves for men,”
“I want to ask the she-god myself. I believe she will give me the power to bend my uncle's will to mine on this matter Ajuoga,”
“I have been waiting for you to ask for proof of the she-god Phenyo...so long have I waited for you to believe. Now you have at last asked to see her, though your asking comes wearing the cloak of disbelief,”
”If I did not believe there was a she-god -” Ajuoga stood and leaned over to touch Phenyo's face and her hand felt for her nose then moved down to her lips. Using the tip of her thumb and the finger next to it she pulled a little at Phenyo's lips and held them tightly, as if one more utterance would summon a known terror. Her next words were frightened, whispered caveats and she let go of Phenyo's lips before she spoke them.
“No, No....No Phenyo! She gives us words only for truth. She does not protect those who use them for lies. You know this daughter. We speak only of what we do or will do or what is – never if I did or did not. There is a she-god or there is not!”
“There is,” said Phenyo, visibly startled.
“I believe. I want to see her,” she continued. She may as well go along with it. Although Ajuoga seemed willing to show her the she-god, she had decided no matter how obviously a figment of Ajuoga's mind, she would behave as though she were real. It was the respectful thing to do.
“Good! Now that you have asked you shall see daughter of mine. Will you lend me your eyes?...will you tell me what you see? I want to know of her face – again...the she-god. I want to know of her beauty! My eyes....my eyes....I only have eyes in my sleep! There was a time when my eyes could see...long ago...I was still a girl. The she-god came to me then but I did not believe! I saw her with my eyes and she took them with her when she left me Phenyo – she took my eyes! I refused to believe but I was only a girl. Will you be my eyes Phenyo? I want to see her face again!”
Ajuoga trembled as she rubbed her hands together. Her words rushed into one another in desperation then were slow, like a procession of beasts running with all their might slowing down for a cliff ahead and slamming into one another's flesh. For the first time Phenyo felt afraid in her company but reached for Ajuoga's leathery face with courage and wiped away the tears with her fingers. Ajuoga seemed more like a stranger with remnants of familiarity to her now.
“Yes mother...from where will she come?”
“Shhh...only believe what you can see...daughter. Believe what you see,” Ajuoga stood slowly and spread her arms – the left one towards the ceiling and the other perpendicular to it. Though closed, her eyes shone a dull white through the lids and escaped between her lashes at the bottom like rays of a partially eclipsed sun. The arch in her back straightened itself triumphantly against the rush of wind that flew into the dwelling, past Phenyo, then orbited both women. Ajuoga's hair rose and fell while Phenyo's neatly woven hair withstood the wind. Dust and small pieces of debris danced. Phenyo stood but wanted badly to abandon her flesh standing there, allowing her self-awareness to escape invisibly, unable to be followed or seen. Shiluba could be heard outside scurrying about and making high-pitched pleas. If the winds didn't calm soon, the chimpanzee would seek comfort in the heights of the trees away from the izindlu.
“Ajuoga?”
“You are Phen-yo,”
“Yes...are you from those before us?”
“Phenyo...you are a fine woman indeed. I see why she loves you so,”
“You are the she-god?”
“Yes,”
“What have you done with mother's tongue?”
“She is here still – and has not been harmed,”
“What do you want of me?”
“I did not summon you Phenyo. What do you desire of me?”
“What is your name?”
“You wanted to know my name? How can a she-god help you?”
“I didn't believe,”
“I know – she knows. I told her you would not believe until you could see,”
“Whose blood belongs to you?”
“No Phenyo, I am not an ancestor of the Kishnu, the Kishnu are of me,”
“Then you are -”
“Phenyo, do you believe?”
“No,”
“Will you believe?”
“Yes,”
Copyright 2012 All Rights Reserved. TK McEachin
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